The Boy who lived….why won’t you die ?? Part 2

So continuing with the misadventures of “ He Who What’s His Name” lets get down to it

5th

So you finally do come to realize that killing the potter alone is almost as tough as stealing the declaration of independence and the increasing no.of failures are hurting your street cred..So its time to wise up and get organized.The thing though he’s looking for now is a supposed prophecy which will give him a one up on potter in his endless desire to kill him.Turns out though the prophecy is that either one of them will end up killing the other (big surprise…btw who comes up with these prophesies....phropheciereres?).Final battle ends up with him possessing potter’s body to lure dumbledore to kill his student(wouldn’t that be the most awesome revenge for a prof though….too bad it wasn’t malfoy).Problem this time? Potter cares too much for his peeps that LV just can’t tolerate all that mush and runs away like a bitch.Again.

Lesson learnt: Going inside teenage boys even in spirit is creepy.And watch more hugh grant movies.

6th and 7th

Time is running out for our beloved baddie as potter is hunting down your horcruxes like there’s no tomorrow.The stakes are finally high for LV as he can no longer mess around anymore.Okay so here’s where the story does indeed get a little complicated but these would be the final snapshots before the epic battle:

The Prof is dead (good luck getting that reco now potter...seriously though can’t get enough of the prof jokes)

Moody and Hedwig are dead. 

Potter and Granger kiss (ooh!)

Horcrux destroyed: 3/7

Dobby is dead.

Ron and Granger kiss (what a slut!)

Horcrux destroyed : 4/7

Snape is dead.

Ginny and Granger kiss (wait….)

So finally what’s LV’s  strategy for killing potter this time around? Simply calling the prey to his den. And lo and behold, he comes with no string attached. A retarded monkey drunk on six cans of beer would be able to do the job this time.Unfortunately for this guy, lightning does indeed strikes twice at the same place. Potter lives and horcrux #6  gone. His bad for not not double checking.

Lesson Learnt: Guns are easier.

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